Geographic location of the bug: New Jersey
Time: 10:03 AM EDT
Your letter to the bugman: Looks like a boring Beatle.
How you want your letter signed: Thanks
You are correct. We identified your beetle as the Living Hickory Borer, Goes pulcher, thanks to Beetles of Eastern North America by Arthur V. Evans, and then we found this matching image on BugGuide. BugGuide notes that the name “Hickory Borer — not recommended, due to potential confusion with Hickory Borer (Megacyllene caryae).”